Dave Cuomo - A Confident Confusion

“Enlightenment might be inherent, but it’s not natural to humans for some reason. In some places they will literally beat it into or out of you. So my question is, what are we doing here? What do you want to get out of this?” - Dave Cuomo

Dave takes a look at a modern Zen conundrum: is a Zen center a place of equal practice and training for all, or is it a service job with necessary hierarchies and distinctions? Is our current model of importing traditional monastic practice really applicable to the busy lay practitioner of today? Is it possible to share the dharma to everyone without watering it down?? Find out here!

Mota Mynttinen - Bottoms Up! (What Am I Doing Here??)

“It was always about what am I contributing? What am I doing out in the world? But yeah, I’m not shooting so high anymore. It’s true, there are important things to be done out there. And the reality is this practice is going to be really important to the future. So sitting is my contribution.” - Mota Mynttinen

Mota open up and regales us with the story of what he’s doing and why he’s here in a raw and revealing account of the traumatic injury that threatened to derail the life he thought he was living. Can sitting up help bring some balance to the world when it goes bottoms up? Is it possible to overcome our addiction to ambition as the meaning of our lives? Can sitting help bridge the gap between being and doing? Find out here!

Dave Cuomo - Beyond Comprehension (Vimalakirti Sutra ch 6)

“If you train yourself to always be confident, competent, and charismatic, you're going to walk into a room and either alienate or inspire everybody, and connect with nobody.

If you’re able to walk into a room with a tickle of anxiety and self doubt, next to some hope and aspiration, all cradled in the big old thromb of emptiness that animates everything, then you can actually connect with people. Maybe.” - Dave Cuomo

Dave regales us with the wild and wacky wizardly hijinks of Chapter 6 of the Vimalakirti Sutra. This week the assembly needs to find itself some chairs, so Vimalakrit busts out his portal gun to go looking for the Greatest Chairs in the Universe, which turn out to be 84,000 feet tall! Can the lesser monks among us measure up to the seats of the great bodhisattvas (metaphor alert…)? And how are we to understand the bodhisattva’s great magic known as “Beyond Comprehension” (irony alert…)? And if, as the sutra says, every jerk in the universe is actually just a bodhisattva in disguise trying to test and train us, what is the actual answer to the test?? Find out here!

Gyokei Yokoyama - Moment of Truth (Retreat Talk pt 2)

“…when you’re totally beaten up and you don’t know what to do, that’s the moment of truth - when suddenly all those Buddhist teachings you’ve read about are no longer just something you read in a book….” - Gyokei Yokoyama

On day two of our Mt Baldy retreat, Gyokei opens himself up for Daisan! - public practice discussion where he fields all of the sangha’s burning questions such as: How do we find meaning in our worldly work? How is North American Zen developing differently from its Japanese roots? How do we raise kids as Buddhists without them growing up to hate us and Buddhism in the process? And can we get Gyokei to spill the beans on his own spiritual awakening? Find out here!

Gyokei Yokoyama - Let’s Be Friends (Retreat Talk pt 1)

“Bodhisattva’s determination is not something that makes you feel leashed or confined. This kind of determination frees you…. It's not self-sacrifice. It's the feeling that I cannot help but do this.” - Gyokei Yokoyama

Gyokei returns from a nationwide tour of the post-pandemic Zen Center scene with an impassioned (and important) message of unity and diversity for all the far flung sanghas of right here and now - from the pure diligent practice of Dogen, to the welcoming warmth of Keizan, and all the many myths, characters, and bodhisattva spirits in between. What do old world and new world Zen have to learn from each other (literally everything...)? What is the hairsbreadth of difference between free giving and self sacrifice (universes!)?? And are we really just here to make friends (absolutely!!)??? Find out here!

Dave Cuomo - Ballad of a Blue House (Shitou’s Straw Hut Song)

“There’s a thousand ways of speaking, infinite understandings, all just inviting you to befriend your unknowing.” - Shitou Xiqian

Dave brings us a fresh original translation of Shitou’s timeless, “Straw Hut Song” - a beautiful and deceptively simple piece that moves from a humble nap in the hay to the boundless fringes of everywhere and nowhere at the drop of a line. Why can’t Shitou just live and love like normal people, and for better or for worse, why is it so easy for us to relate? Is his ancient wisdom something he can teach us, or something we already know? As translators, can we be faithful to our forbears as we dust off their lines, and still make their songs sing?? Find out here.

John Nilsson - Continuing Bewilderments (What Am I Doing Here??

”…it was like, ooh, I don't have to count breaths? I liked that idea… no anchor, nothing holding me to this cushion… where was I going to go?

It was scary, but liberating. I thought, ‘Hmm… maybe I shouldn't tell anybody that I'm doing this… But I can do this. This is something I could do every day.’” - John Nilsson

John shares the raw unvarnished story of what he’s doing and why he’s here, from growing up in the triumphal certainty of the Mormon Church, to a kindly German Buddha compassionately bursting that bubble with the liberating chaos of uncertainty. What do we do when no one is telling us what to do? Is Zen a suitable religion for the irreligious? And just how much meditation does it take to master levitation?? Find out here!

Dave Cuomo - Why Bother? (Why Not?! (Vimalakirti ch 5))

“The goal here isn't to stop feeling pain. We need you to feel pain." - Dave Cuomo

In pt 4 of our Vimalakirti series , the great bodhisattva Manjusrhi finally meets the enlightened laymen Vimalakirti himself for some playfully profound dharma combat as they tackle the big questions; why do we have trouble? How should we care for other people when they have trouble?? How should we care for ourselves when we have trouble??Can we really rid ourselves of all pain, and if so, should we??? Let’s find out.

Gyokei Yokoyama - Pressure Pot

“We all think that we're a good person, that we're some form of intelligent. In the monastery, they compassionately take that away and help us remember that there is something more important.” - Gyokei Yokoyama

Gyokei takes us on a personal tour of zazen from the monastic perspective; from the enlightenment of certain failure, to the raw self underneath we may or may not be ready to meet. How is zazen supposed to wake us up when it’s always putting us to sleep? Is it possible to be ambitious in practice without being goal driven? Do we really need rough rude awakenings to drop off the self or is there a kindler gentler way? Find out here!

Emily Eslami - Good Grief

“Part of grief is that you can't predict it. It just happens and you have no control over it. And some of that aspect of grief is accepting that you don't have control; or maybe not accepting, actually resisting it entirely and rebelling against it, and being afraid that you don't have control over your loved ones disappearing and going. And maybe getting over it is accepting impermanence, accepting that ‘however you imagine it, it always turns out other than that.’” - Emily Eslami

In true Bodhisattva fashion, Emily shares a recent loss and takes the opportunity for a heartfelt look into Buddhist teachings on grief. Can a practice of non attachment offer any solace for the attachments we don’t want to let go of? Are the enlightened masters of old too enlightened to offer anything more than the cold comfort of dispassion? Is there good in grief? Let’s discuss.

Dave Cuomo - A Stranger to Cares (Discernment vs Discrimination)

“If anything you say is going to be wrong, you might as well say it right” - Colin Young

Dave takes a Zen look at making choices - what are wise discernments and what is the delusion of discrimination? Along the way we get a dramatic reading of the Xinxin Ming, Sengcan’s classic treatise on choice, and some practical advice on how to deal with the annoying DJ in the apartment upstairs.

Jason Dodge - Get Lost (Ryokan and Zen Arts)

“A professional artist is someone who understands what they're doing and are just going to do what they understand.

An amateur is going into something with the understanding you're going to get lost.” - Jason Dodge

Jason takes us on a delightful walk through the life and work of Ryokan, the famous wandering poet monk of Edo Japan, while holding up Ryokan’s poetry as a mirror to reflect on how Zen has informed his own work as a professional artist, and how practice can both fuel and confound the work of any creative. Along the way we get practical advice for the Zen artist in all of us, poetry battles between brothers, trippy verses written on skulls, and what happens when a lover leaves Ryokan’s best texts on read.

Dave Cuomo - Silly Human Stuff (Yogacara - The Thrilling Conclusion)

“If you can sit zazen until you don't need to get up in the middle, then you're really content with nothing. When you're content with nothing, you don’t need to go out and find things to fill that big empty hole inside of you. The less you need, the less you have to worry about. I highly recommend it.” - Dave Cuomo

In the thrilling conclusion to his Yogacara series, Dave wraps it all up with some epic poetry from Vasubandhu and a brief overview of how exactly all this theory helps, what exactly it helps us do, and why none of that is the point since all of it was just an illusion anyway. Why do Zennies take themselves so seriously when everything is ultimately imaginary? How is being depressed the cure for depression? And what is the fundamental essence of text anxiety?? Find out here!

Erik Andersen - A Hairsbreadth of Difference

“You might think you're no good or you can't do anything. But the more you think that, the more you might be missing that little hairsbreadth of difference that could be the difference between heaven and earth.

Anything can happen at any time.

The message is to not believe anything. To just be cautious. And to take everything with a grain of salt.” - Erik Andersen

Erik brings us the story of one little phrase that can make all the difference in the universe - Fayan’s “A hairsbreadth of difference between heaven and earth.” One thought, one word, one moment, how can we change the world in the space of a hair? How can we ever truly meet someone if the space between us is world’s away? Find out here!

Dave Cuomo - “Now What??” (Vimalakirti pt 3)

“Ultimately, you can't separate yourself from the things that you or others do wrong. There's no glory in being better than other people.” - Dave Cuomo 

In pt 3 of his thrilling Vimalakirti Sutra series, Dave regales us with the story of the time our titular hero, the enlightened layman Vimalakirti, sought out each of Buddha’s best monks to explain to them exactly how they’re doing it all wrong. What does true quiet sitting look like? How do we attain Nirvana without turning our back on desire? What’s the difference between evil and tragedy? And does being good ultimately do anyone any good? Find out here!

Leon Sandler - Spinning Plates (What Am I Doing Here??)

“They say there is only suffering. Even happiness is just another form of suffering. And I can see that. But what do you do with that knowledge? Do you still go to birthday parties? Do you go on dates? And what do you say? Do you just say ultimately happiness and unhappiness are just the head and tail of the same snake?

I don’t know if there’s a quick and easy solution I can give to that. And if you have one, please hit me up.” - Leon Sandler

ACZC’s own Leon Sandler takes the hot seat to tell us the story of what he’s doing and why he’s here. From Denver to Istanbul, spanning continents and lifetimes, Leon spins us a story of the great open question: what does it mean to live a normal life in a practice that deconstructs any such notion into the ridiculousness of oblivion? Find out here!

Gyokei Yokoyama - Spiritual Fermentation (Jukai)

"Precepts are what humbles us. It's not designed to inflate our imagination. It sobers us. The precepts come with an understanding that we are constantly, in each moment, failing. And that's why we uphold the precepts." - Gyokei Yokoyama

Gyokei returns to the hot seat with an in depth and personal look at precepts and Jukai (lay precept ceremony). From the historical and cultural roots, to his own experiences growing up Zen in all its childhood innocence and angry adolescence, this is a story of making friends with your shadow side and tripping over the truth until you finally fall face first into it.

Dave Cuomo - Swooning Buddhas! (Vimalakirti Sutra -ch 2)

“If we started with the goal of becoming happy and wise enough to attract better people into our lives and making a better world together, now they’re telling us the real liberation is to not need to think like that at all - to be so free that you’re not worried about what kind of world you live in. In fact if you were truly free, you might just choose to go for the most troublesome people in the lowest places, because your real joy and calling is to be where you’re needed the most.” - Dave Cuomo

In our latest installment of Zen Story Time, Dave brings us part 2 of the Vimalakirti Sutra. Here we meet our eponymous hero, Vimalakirti, the enlightened laymen who spends his days at the gambling halls and his nights at the bars and brothels - a bodhisattva so free of attachments that he has no qualms spending his life immersed in them (only for the good of all beings of course…). Will he be able to bring the light of wisdom to the darkest corners of the world? Find out here!

Jordan Mylet - An Unmitigated Good (What Am I Doing Here??)

"The funny thing about zazen is, it can’t be fooled. The funny thing about Zen is I can’t crush it or not crush it. So all I really want to do is be honest and convey something true for a second. And when I remember that, I kinda can" - Jordan Mylet

Jordan regales us with a warm and insightful love letter to zazen, as part of our "What Am I Doing Here??" series, where long time sangha members (like you!) tell us the story of what they are doing and why they are here. What happens when all you want is to enjoy a nice day at the park, and next thing you know you're on a years long quest to unravel the great question of who and what you are just to be able to find a little peace underneath the trees? How do we make peace with the world that's rattling around inside our own heads? Is it possible to become a better shiner you without digging ourselves deeper into the great pits of ego in the process?? Find out here!

Dave Cuomo - Aching Joy (Yogacara - The Afflictions)

“When we’re talking about joy, I mean the kind of joy that you might feel at a funeral, a crying aching joy that encompasses everything. It's like, no, this whole thing is beautiful and I'm glad we did this. And I would do it all over again.” - Dave Cuomo

Dave brings us an optimistic look at the afflictions - greed, hatred, delusion, anger, guile (a personal favorite), arrogance, laziness, and all the rest. How do me make allies out of our restless shadow sides and finally have a chance at whatever they mean by “free will”? How can we learn to read a room by taking a good hard look in the mirrors of our own minds? And if we really want to be our best selves, should we be going to therapy or doing zazen? (Spoiler alert: the answer is yes!) Find out here!